The Title: Labeling Relationships

Some people are content with ” Ain’t nobody’s business, We both know what it is, What’s understood doesn’t need to be explained relationships” OR as I like to call them “situation-ships”.

The situation  is you’re not good enough to get a title?

^ We will revisit that again shortly.

There are women and even men who could care less about the titles associated with being with someone. As long as they get the perks, the midnight “hot breathe calls” , the occasional D/V for whatever someones sexual preference is, they’re content.

To some a title is just that.. a title. It carries no weight has no significance and can easily be upgraded or downgraded. Some people would rather keep things simple and stress free by not including an appellation to complicate things or garner attention  from onlookers. They would rather things be a “secret” or insist it is no ones business what they want to do with their lives.

Would I want to be a secret?

Would I be okay with just being that girl that he talks too but were not dating, but were serious, but not serious enough for him to want to make me his, but were exclusive, but we have no title?

 

I have a confession to make: I love titles. CEO. COO. GIRL BOSS. OWNER. GIRLFRIEND. BOO. BOYFRIEND. I love them all. The last few “situation ships” I have found myself in one of the main issues I think that were dominant were that the guy(s) I was talking too either wanted too much or too little and I was unwilling to compromise in fear that things would backfire and I would either lose interest or fall in love too fast.

What is the main significance behind titles that has some girls willing to drop the guy they are talking too when he is unable to “fully commit” by giving her a title that’s not legally binding? Is it the fear that he will leave, the uncertainty of how serious he will or will not take us?

What if you already met the family, help his mom cook dinner all the time, frequently attend family events, maybe even live together.. does a title change anything then?

Yes. That’s it. That’s my Question.

Does a title really change things?

If he goes from calling me his special lady to his girlfriend will there be perks and incentives that come with my new found “upgrade”?

No one should ever have to ask the person they are with to give them a “title” that makes society look at them in a better light. I strongly advocate for people having their own free will and doing what they want to do when they want to do it. No pressure.

If your significant other is unwilling to naturally ask you to be in a mutually fulfilling monogamous relationship the question arises of why are you even with them?

My heart tingles and my stomach flutters (no its not gas) when I see people claiming one another not just on social media but in pubic. TOO many girls/guys claim to be committed yet demonstrate and practice the practices of one who is NOT in anything serious enough to be”labeled”. If you cant see yourself being that persons husband/wife one day what’s the purpose of being with them?

I don’t know about anyone else but I do NOT believe in situationships. Been there, done that and It did not end well. I am not saying a title automatically guarantees that your special someone will be committed and loving and treat you like the queen/king you are..

That’s Fiction.

However a title to me is a verbal affirmation, It makes this that much more real.

Its a title as someone’s wife that allows me to  carry his last name, help create a new legacy as well as shows the world around me that I belong to him and vice versa.

This could just be me, I’m sure there are people out there who could care less about a title and care more about what the other person tells them it “is”.

Are we so obsessed with titles that we ignore the way we are treated all in the name of being his gf/ or her man?

Do we want the title or the relationship?

If you’ve “been” with someone for years and there is no progression, should the next step not be to make things more “official” ? Shouldn’t the person you’re with be worth taking the next step for?

I planned this to be a interactive post, Let me know what you think..

Does a Title Matter to You?

OR

Is that just another way of Labeling Relationships?

3 thoughts on “The Title: Labeling Relationships

  1. I couldn’t agree more! Titles absolutely matter. I’ve tried the whole “ we know what we are” and I have learned that the truth is I’m not what that person wants. I’m simply killing time until the “perfect mate” comes along (whatever perfect is for them). I’m not getting any younger and don’t have time to waste. So no matter how “serious” things appear to be; if there’s no title then I’m gone!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Two things:
    If your fiancé have an last name that doesn’t ring with you’re first name, will you still change it?

    Titles are not a measure of anything in an of themselves. Behaviour – Respect, Honesty, Affirmation (public and private), chasing and investing in more than pumpum (adding value, and thinking about how they add value), are all measures of greater significance that a title.

    Like

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