I guess I’m not REAL Enough

Society preaches that we should do what makes us happy, do what makes us feel truly “ourselves” and in tune with who we are or want to potentially be. 

My entire life I found myself being judgmental and narrow minded when it came to anything that was body image, enhancement or aesthetics related. I guess because of my home environment I was ignorant to certain things that women and men could do to themselves. 

A few weeks ago, I was approached by Dr.Bectors team in regards to a partnership, an offer I could NOT refuse. One of my main issues I have struggled with and have been open about often on other blog posts and Vlogs: my weight. Over the last 10 years my weight has moved up and down on a monthly basis. There was a time when I was a double zero/two and everything fit me because XS/S were always the available sizes left in the mall. Once puberty hit and my body started spreading left and right I found myself gaining weight at a rapid rate, something I was not prepared for mentally or physically.  When Dr.Bector allowed me the opportunity to modify a problem area I have had for my entire life, I thought it would be foolish of me to say no.

Starting my first procedure 3 weeks ago, I agreed to get KYBELLA done to my small pudge and love handle area to help me achieve the ideal body I want. My experience getting the first procedure done was painful ( I won’t lie) but it was worth it. Seeing the potential for amazing results in under 2 months had me anxious, excited and hopeful. Aside from the light swelling and burning sensations that came with the NON-SURGICAL treatment , my overall experience was amazing. 


On my social media platforms I have recently been spreading messages about self love, self acceptance and confidence. Having gone through fazes in my own life when I was not content with my overall appearance I have finally come to a place where my acceptance of who I am and what I have to offer has increased. Despite my conscious efforts to promote self love and acceptance and help other females who have been in the same place I once was , there will always always ALWAYS be those one or two who will find a needle in the haystack.

Thats not a good needle either. 

I have had a lot of people commenting on my choices about doing alterations to my body, expressing their confusion, concern and discomfort with my actions.

I just want to set the record straight in the most diplomatic, educated, and friendly way.

Equating one doing something to better themselves to not “loving yourself” to me is a VERY confusing concept.. and here is why I say this.

When we :
Wear Extensions
Go to the Gym
Wear Braces
Wear Makeup
Have certain Eating Habits
Bleach our skin
Bleach our teeth
Dress a certain way
Get a breast reduction/ Augmentation
Wear a Body Shaper
Wear a push up bra or panty
Wear fake nails or lashes
Wax or Shave any hair on your body
Wear Lip Plumper Lip Gloss
Get body art/ piercings
Dye or Bleach your hair
Clean the MATTA out of our eye canna * yes I went there*
Are we not altering and changing ourselves? Does this mean that we love ourselves any less? 
Are we just doing these to ENHANCE things about ourselves?

If my mother never spent THOUSANDS of dollars of braces and retainers, acne treatments and washes and quality clothing.. would I be able to TRULY love myself today? 
Had she not seen what a painful future would have came to her daughter if she had crocked teeth, bad skin and didn't dress a certain way, would I be this confident and self "absorbed".

Regardless of if we want to accept it or NOT, we all have done and probably will do things to ourselves to enhance the natural beauty that GOD gave us.

Does that mean we love ourselves any less?


Does that make us less of a person?


Does that change our stance and place in this earth or the impact we could potentially have on the life of others?


If we are going to be 100. lets be 100.

If you have never ever done anything to alter your physical appearance in any way then KUDOS to you. But if you have had to bleach a dark spot from acne, add weave to your hair to protect it from breaking, contour your face for a photoshoot or event, put on fake nails, pierce or add any art to your body…

What was your reasoning behind what you did .. and did it change you for the better or worse?

The Good Book even says ” He that is without sin cast the first stone”, I can easily relate that back to this blog.

If you aren’t operating , working and living in your TRUE NATURAL self.

You are not allowed to judge, condemn or put down anyone .

I have worked too hard, cried too many tears and disliked myself for too long to have negative people try and tear me down because I decided to do something for ME.

And thats what makes life so interesting.

We do things to please ourselves, the only being we truly know and can rely on.. just to have people who are wishy washy, emotional, fake and jealous bring us down with their OWN personal insecurities.

I love who I am, the Beautiful Black woman that I am becoming. I love the influence I have, the lives I have touched and the messages I have proclaimed.

If my sassiness, Realness, Openness, Transparency, willingness to help others grow and excel AND desire to see ALICIA be the BEST Alicia possible…





3 responses to “I guess I’m not REAL Enough”

  1. Great read! Do what makes you happy! You are very talented.


  2. Wow. You look amazing. I’ve always seen you as 🙌🏾👌🏿👌🏿👌🏿 a beautiful lady but your background and family status as a Christian. I didn’t even think about saying anything to you. So your thing GORGEOUS 🙌🏾🙌🏾🔥🔥🔥


  3. Loved everything about this! My only thing is if you’re going to do these things then own it! I think the issue with society is we try and lie or hide our enhancements. Be true to yourself and everyone else and never criticize anyone for what they do because everyone, I mean EVERYONE has done something to themselves. Just own it and Live Free!


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