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Dear BLACK MEN:
Your kinks, coils and strength amuse me and I am proud to be your woman. I admire your perseverance even during adversity and your willingness to go against the stereotypical grain fed by society saying who YOU are. You are so powerful and the world is scared that when you realize the power you have that things will have to change. I love that you come in so many shades and sizes, fit to appease all my appetites. I love the way you’ve loved my mom, my aunts and all the strong women before me. I am thankful that you have been providing for me, ensuring I am fed, educated and set on a good path. I love that you are becoming Doctors and Lawyers and even pursuing positions in politics, challenging the MAN.
I can’t wait to marry you one day. To become your wife, take on your name and build with YOU. I can’t wait to show the world that Black families can be stable and secure. I can’t wait to go against the grain that says that Black men can’t stay with their families and don’t understand the concept of LONG term commitment. You are more than just a thug or a gang banger or even a scammer, and whatever society keeps trying to label you as I won’t accept.
Dear Black Men. I would ride for you… But before I do there’s some things I need to get off my chest.
Im tired of feeling inadequate compared to other women of every other rainbow shade. I am sick of being made to feel like my blackness, the same blackness we share is a curse and not a blessing. It’s because of you why so many women feel insecure, and unsure. I blame you for Kim K and her horrible shape and all the other non WOC who have felt the need to alter their bodies to please YOU. Ive never seen so many women wanting to be tanned have a booty and full lips so BADLY. Why is my Blackness an issue to you? My complexion the basis of your desire to court me? Why project your own internal insecurities onto me, make me feel like being a Black women and I mean a REAL black women is a bad thing. Its’ not fair that you show every other women more love than me, the women who came from the same struggles as you. I was told you would prefer a woman who has all I have but remains silent, a woman who doesn’t bicker like I do.
I am exhausted at your comments concerning my hair, the same hair passed down from OUR ancestors. I don’t care if you don’t like weave nor and I fazed about your opinions concerning Lace Fronts ( MEEK MILL). Why Is it so hard for you to accept me just the way I am without wanting to change so much about me. I refuse to add tracks and contraptions, creamy crack or texturized to my hair to tame my crown so people won’t look down on you. When I wear extensions you have an issue, but when I show my coils you barely look at me. Why does my fro offend you? I thought I could be myself around you? I thought that if I came as I was and was transparent you would accept me.
Why don’t you want to build with me? Why is it that once fame and fortune come into the picture I am your last resort or not an option at all. Is it because I am sassy, does my inherited strong persona scare you off.. or are you just not man enough for me? Why can’t you commit to me and ONLY me? Is there too many options, too much variety and a fish full of sea better than me?
Over it. I can honestly say I am over it all. I am tired of holding you down when you don’t want to hold me down. I am sick of advocating for you when you aren’t even looking my way. I come in all shades and sizes. I may not be Light skin, I may not be mixed and my hair may not be a certain texture but I am still a woman. I am your woman. It hurts me that every other man makes me feel the way Ive been longing for you to make me feel. I hate that I have to resort to men who don’t know the struggles and trials that comes with being US, to feel loved.
You say you don’t want to see me with a white man, but he accepts the things you are too blinded to accept and love. Other cultures stress the importance of marriage and commitment yet you’re giving me a run around.
Im done.
Yes I said it
Dear Black Men. I am done.
Im done allowing you to make me feel this way. Im done allowing your opinion to control my self worth and esteem. I can’t love you if you don’t want to love me. I can’t hold you down anymore.
Im willing to let you go.
Give you away to the world and let them have their way with you how they best see fit. I am done babying you and taking on the mothering role.
Dear Black Men
Two can play that Game.
xoxo
Lici.
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